I enjoy a good food challenge from time to time. Shit, I’ve been known to eat a monster sandwich when the opportunity arises. Reminds me of one of my favorite motivational quotes…”Any pizza is a personal pizza, if you try hard enough”… Not exactly sure who said that but it was probably somebody awesome like Ghandi, or Carrot Top. This brings me to the Heart Attack Special. As you can see on the menu below this beast packs enough meat to choke Pamela Anderson. With 1/2 pound of beef, 1/2 pound of spicy Italian sausage, ham, bacon, 6 slices of cheese and a fried egg it’ll fill you up. They also, don’t use buns, they use grilled cheese sandwiches to hold this glorious bastard together.
A good friend of mine has been talking about taking me to this event for a while and it never lined up in our schedules until now. It happens on Friday’s during the winter months here in Anchorage (so almost year round) and the reviews have been well received. Another friend of mine just got back from Kosovo and we decided to move our weekly Ale House visit to the burger party. People underestimate my stomach all the time, its OK, I don’t hold it against them. But when they start talking shit is when I have to put them in their place.
I was late to the party do to a ‘work event’ that went about 5 hours longer than it should have. My friend, I’ll call him Nancy for the amount he bitched, decided to order the Heart Attack as well, in an effort to show me up before I could even get there. Of course I got berated with text messages and pictures of Nancy eating this burger while I’m putting in real work. I don’t know the exact head start Nancy had, but it was at least 45 minutes.
He She was down to about 4 bites left by the time I got there. I still came within minutes of slaying this beast in his her face. All I heard was excuses about his huge vagina small stomach, the sausage was too hot, so on and so forth. It took me roughly 25 minutes to put this one in the book. I’ll give Nancy some credit, she finished though (unlike most girls I take out). So he she can write home about that.
I think there is another burger night left this season, and I’ll head back for a real cheeseburger. This was a great burger but no way I can put it in the running for best burger in Anchorage. It would be like putting Miguel Cabrera up against a high school kid in a home run derby. They don’t even belong in the same ball park. The Heart Attach was delicious on top of being a novelty. Everything about it makes me think this place has some good as burgers. Fat cooks, juicy patties and melty cheese. Keep an eye out for another review on this place. Hopefully Nancy will have manned up by then.